I had actually started drafting a “here is what went down” for the guild forums so people knew what was happening, but the more I wrote and read it, the more I felt like I was having to justify our decision. And that’s the thing, we DON’T have to justify it. It is what it is, and it’s a shame it occured, but it’s done.

I provided everyone who was online at the time a “cliff notes” version in guild chat, and I feel were very fair to “chas” in our detail of what occured, and honest in our statement that we were sad to see him go. We opened the door to let anyone with questions approach any one of the three officers with questions and/or concerns on the issues. And do you know how many we received? Just one…from someone who wasn’t online the night it happened, and just asking why he wasn’t guilded any longer.

The more I thought about it, the more I thought that it’s probably just best to let it die down, and let anyone that wanted to discuss it with us, ask about it. My biggest concern is that someone will ask him what occured and get a somewhat inaccurate account, and then not ask us for more detail. However, I think that because we have always been fair, honest and transparent in our leadership, people will also give us a little bit of credit.

I have nothing else constructive to add.

In my opinion, the best way to deal with drama is to try to keep it private, and just between the parties involved. The few people that know about it, the fewer people will be affected by the outcome.

I went to your blog today, for my normal morning visit, to be met with a internet block from work for…wait for it…”Sexual Content”. W.T.F. So I opened up my google workaround to see what could have possibly prompted this block (usually I get hit with a “games” block). Could it have seriously been your post about star crossed lovers?! Alas…I do not know.

Back to topic:
My job frequently requires me to be diplomatic and maintain composure in difficult situations, and this is something that I try to let carry over into guild management. Not to say that I don’t have my moments where I, too, just lose it, but I try hard to remain calm. Sometimes cold, rational logic in the face of controversy throws people through a loop and they don’t know how to react. Sometimes people are so worked up that they cannot, or do not want to, see logic.

I had hoped that we could have resolved the issues without losing a member of our guild, but…as the title says, sometimes you just have to make difficult decisions.

The entire situation was just ugly…and I suppose bound to come to a head at some point with the removal of someone. And let’s be honest, I’m no Ghandi, and I do not have infinite patience (just ask anyone that raids with us!). There was bound to be a point where my rage bar went red as my patience meter emptied

I, personally, find Chasesta a raging bitch 90% of the time. But, every family has one. She IS just like Aunt Martha…only I frequently exercise my right to tell her to shut the fuck up when she’s crossed the line. She is annoying, but it is just who she is. She can be a total bitch…but she doesn’t discriminate. Everyone else in the guild just takes it for what it is, doesn’t take it personally, and moves along. Just like Chas, she, too, is a contributor, and frequently offers to lead and host things on off nights that people enjoy (granted, she has a good number of people who just won’t sign up for her raids because they can’t stand her as well).

The truth is, I didn’t want to loose either of them. Despite their uniqueness they were both contributing members of the guild…and had become members of the Monolith family. I suppose that is why I spent months trying to work everything out.

Monolith has a few unique members, and I find the best way to integrate new people into our long standing family, is just to give them a heads up on what to expect from certain people in the guild

There are three people that I always give new members a heads up on, as they tend to rub people the wrong way at first until they get to know them…and you know what they say about first impressions:
“Chasesta is a bit of a spitfire, so don’t take anything she may say personally, if she offends you it’s probably not intentionally, but if it becomes a problem, please let me know”;

“Inactive Warrior was a founding member of the guild, but is also a guy who loves “hot topics” and a good debate, and sometimes will speak just to see the responses he receives. If you find him offensive, please feel free to place him on ignore”;

and “Mage, is a bit of a know-it-all, but means very well. He really is quite knowledgable, but lacks some finesse in his presentation of this knowledge, so don’t be offended if he comes off a bit arrogant, he really is a nice guy”.

5 years of experience has taught me that you can head off a lot of problems, and help people become better aclimated to your guild, by just heading off known potential issues!

If I’m going to be completely honest, I am relieved that there is finally a resolution to this particular drama. I don’t know that I am particularly happy about the resolution, but I also know that I am no longer going to cringe everytime I open up the forums and see a message in my PM box, or get a whisper from particular people. And that, in itself, is a relief.

This has really only been the first hiccup in our alt run, but that might be because when I started them I said “If they end up being more work than fun, I will not continue doing them”, so people had a vested interest in keeping them fun. Which is what they were meant to be.

I absolutely think that people get angry because they don’t like being honest with themselves about having erred in one way or another. It’s easier for some people to just shut down their mind to logic and reason than it is to admit you had done something wrong. We’ve offered this particular member a return spot as a friends and family member, which I very much doubt he will accept, but I also think that he expected us to coddle him and tell him we didn’t want him to go. So, I tend to think it was a bit of a shock to him when that didn’t occur, and he was removed.

As for the GDKP runs, not very many people from the guild attended them, but they were often attending by people who would also help out elsewhere. Ultimately, there were two big concerns: 1) we have a very healthy friends and family rank and we have alot of people who like to run extra runs, 10 mans, etc. on our off nights, and the GDKP runs actually interferred with the planning of those runs, because people who would generally attend these guild sponsered runs would now not commit themselves. And, Chas would get upset if someone scheduled a run around the same time as his GDKP run, feeling that they were trying to “sabatoge” his run. This part wasn’t public knowledge, but was something I heard about reguarly from him. And 2) there is a real concern with something going wrong within the runs, and Monolith taking the fall for it, which is something we weren’t willing to continue doing.

Of course…we had also concluded that Chas just wanting out, without just being upfront about wanting out, was also a strong possibility that shouldn’t be dismissed. *shrug*

As for your guild problems…it’s got to be the planets aligning strangely or something!

I can’t access your site from work (which is why I don’t reply frequently, even though I really want to!) unless I use google translator, which won’t let me log in to reply, but I read it daily! I read your post this AM, and I don’t know if I can offer advice! You seem to already give good advice

As for two officers at each other…that was one of the things that lead to our guild split back in Vanilla. It is nasty, nasty business Hopefully you guys are all able to get everything worked out without too much colleteral damage from the results. Good Luck!