Archive for the ‘Mushrooms’ Category

The Lorax   4 comments

With my sincerest apologizes to Dr. Seuss.
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At the far end of town, where the fool’s cap grows and the wind smells slow and sour and no bugs ever sing excepting old Klaxxi is the street of the lifted Lorax. And deep in the fool’s cap, some people say, if you look deep enough you can still see, today, where the lorax once stood just as long as it could, before someone lifted the Lorax away.

What was the Lorax? And why was it there? And why was it lifted and taken somewhere from the far end of town where the fool’s cap all grows? Ghostcrawler still lives here. Ask him. He knows.

You won’t see Ghostcrawler. Don’t knock at his door. He stays in his tree, planted in his grove. He lurks in the branches where the leaves have all fallen, and he makes his own clothes from mushrooms and rejuvenallen. And on special dank midnights in November, he peeks out of the shutters and sometimes he speaks and tells how the Lorax was lifted away.

He’ll tell you perhaps…if you’re willing to pay.

On the end of a line he lets down a tin pail and you have to toss in the cap of three mushrooms and a snail. Then he pulls up the pail, makes a most careful count to see if you’ve paid him the proper amount. Then he hides what you paid him away in the claws, his secret strange hole in his gruvvulous paws. Then he grunts, “I will call you by crab-a-phone, for the secrets I tell you are for your ears alone”.

Down inches the crab-a-phone until it reaches your ear and the old crab’s whispers are not very clear.

“Now I’ll tell you,” he says, with his claws sounding gray, “how the Lorax got lifted away”.

It all started way back, such a long time ago, in the days when the fool’s cap did not grow. When the trees all had branches, leaves rustling in the wind. Before mushrooms bloomed, and dangers loomed, I came to this glorious place. At first I saw the trees! The glorious happy trees, with bright colored branches and heals that didn’t sneeze! Their leaves, oh their leaves! All dancing in the breeze!

And under the trees, I saw brown guardians frisking in their big bear butt suits as they played in the shade and were healed by the trees. From the rippulous pond came the comfortable sound of the orcas all humming while splashing around. But those trees! Those trees! Those healing trees! All my life I’ve been searching for trees such as these! The touch of their rejuvs, the tickle of growth, warmed my injured heart like butterfly milk. I felt a great leaping of joy in my heart, I knew just what I’d do and I unloaded my crab cart!

I no time at all, I realized they needed a change. So I sat in my shop and pondered giving them the chop. With all my great skill, and with my great crab speed, I realized I knew just what they need! I planted my mushrooms and awaited fungal explosion, my claws were crackling with the thought of implosion! The instant I’d finished, I heard a ga-Zump! I looked, I saw something pop out of a stump! It was a sort of man.

Describe him? That’s hard. I don’t know if I can.

He was shortish. And oldish. And brownish. And Mossy. And he spoke with a voice that was sharpish and bossy! “Mister!” he said with a fungal born sneeze, “I am the Lorax. I speak for the trees. I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongues. And I’m asking you sir, at the top of my lungs!”. He was very upset as he shouted and puffed. “What’s that thing you’ve made from my trees tuft!”.

“Look, Lorax” the crab said “There’s no cause for alarm. The Mushrooms will heal and I’m doing no harm. I’m being quite useful, in offering this tool, mushrooms are something that all people need! They plant, they heal, they have other uses! They aren’t rotational, but druids will love them and sing of them like muses!”.

The Lorax said, “Sir! You are crazy, my friend. There is no one on earth who will use them in the end!”.

The crab laughed at the Lorax, “You poor stupid guy! You will use them, and like it, or just manage to get by”.

“I repeat,” cried the Lorax, “I speak for the trees!”

“I’m busy,” I told him. “Shut up, if you please”. I rushed to the phone to put in a quick call, I called all my brothers and uncles and devs and I said, “Listen here! Here’s a wonderful chance to plant with mushrooms and watch them explode! Get over here fast! Take the road to the Steppes and turn south at the wastes”. And, in no time at all, in the grove that I built the who crab family was working full tilt. We were all planting mushrooms just as busy as bees, to the crying sound of all of the trees.

We were planting mushrooms as fast as before, and that Lorax? Well, he didn’t show up anymore.

But the next week he knocked on my new office door. He snapped “I’m the Lorax, who speaks for the trees, who you seems to be stifling as fast as you please. But I’m also in charge of the guardian bears who played and received heals in their big bear butt suits. NOW…thanks to your mushrooms there aren’t enough heals for the trees to toss around. And my poor guardians are all getting the crummies because they have mushrooms rotting their tummies! They loved living here, but I can’t let them stay. They’ll have to find heals, and I hope that they may.” And then the Lorax sent them away.

I, the crab, felt sad as I watched them all go. BUT…Mushrooms are Mushrooms, and they must grow, regardless of crummies in tummies you know. I meant no harm, I truly did not. But I was sold on three mushrooms, so a planting I got. I planted them here, I planted them there, I advocated their usefulness everywhere. I went right on planting my mushrooms, and I didn’t worry about the healing, which the trees didn’t need.

Then again he came back! I was trying new shrooms when that old nuisance Lorax came back with more gripes!

“I am the Lorax,” he coughed and whiffed. “Crab!” he cried with a croak “Crab! You’re making such your making the blooming broke”. My poor moonkin, why they can’t starfall a single star! No one can with no healing to keep them afloat! And so”, said the Lorax, “please pardon my fear, but they cannot leave here. So I’m sending them off.”

“Where will they go?” I don’t hopefully know. Somewhere with rain and mists I imagine. To escape from the mushrooms you’ve planted here. “What’s more,” snapped the Lorax (His dander was up) “your mushrooms are send the trees into a gloom.”

And then I got mad. I got terribly mad. I yelled at the Lorax, “Now listen here, Dad! All you do is yap-yap and say BAD BAD BAD! Well, I have my thoughts and I’m telling you I intend on doing just what I do! And, for your information, you Lorax, I’m figgering on keeping mushrooms without biggering! Because mushrooms are the answer that EVERYONE needs!”.

And at that very moment, we heard a loud whack. From outside in the grove came a sickening smack.

We look out the window to see the last tree had fallen. Their spirit crushed and their branches swaying. The trees walked away, the grove left decaying. The devs looked around me, and started to pack up, with no trees there was no back up. Now all that was left ‘neath the mushroom covered sky was my big empty grove…the Lorax…and I.

The Lorax said nothing. Just gave me a glance…just gave me a very sad, sad backward glance…as he lifted himself by the seat of his pants. And I’ll never forget the grim look on his face when he heisted himself and took leave of this place. Through a hole in the mushrooms, without leaving a trace. And all the Lorax left here in this mess was a small pile of rocks, with one word….”UNLESS”.

Through the expansion, as my mushrooms have fallen apart, I’ve worried about the trees with all of my heart. “But now,” says the crab, “Now that you’re here, the word of the Lorax seems perfectly clear. UNLESS someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not. SO…Catch!” calls the crab and he lets something fall. “It’s a mushroom spore, the last one of all! You’re in charge of the fate of the trees, and trees are really what everyone needs. Plant a new thought, treat it with care. Give it clean water and feed it fresh air. Grow a forest, make it big and strong. Protect it from Mushrooms, and sing it a song. Then the Lorax and all of his friends may come back.”

Photobucket Pictures, Images and Photos

Posted November 12, 2012 by Beruthiel in Druid Healing, Just for Fun!, Mushrooms

MoP Beta: Thoughts on Mana, the Druid Toolkit and Early Healing at Level 90   1 comment

This weekend I spent some time in the beta trying to get a feel for both mana and healing at level 90. Since I learned early on that I was likely going to be unavailable for just about all of the raid testing that was happening on weekdays while I was still at work, I was fairly unmotivated to continue my level push to 90. I wasn’t going to be able to contribute where I wanted, being raid testing, and there were better things I could spend my time on. However, after the surprise round of weekend testing (which was blatantly obvious in being scheduled to combat a Guild Wars 2 beta weekend), I decided to get my ass in gear and push out the last two levels on the beta. Granted, I would be shocked if we see another set of weekend raid tests, but nonetheless if they are appear, I will be ready.

Anyhow, this is just a really long winded way of saying “I’m not qualified to tell you how your mana is going to be in raids”. I’ve talked to a few people who are doing some of the beta testing, and they’ve indicated that mana is tight – but that it’s tight across the board and all healers are in the same boat.

What I do feel qualified to spend a little bit of time talking about is how your mana and spells feel before you enter a raid environment. I spent quite a bit of time on Sunday running five of the nine heroics available: Gate of the Setting Sun, Scarlet Monastery, Scarlet Halls, Scholomance and Mogu’shan Palace. I ran all of them with Brade tanking and three PuG DPS. I’ve captured FRAPS of all of the bosses for each instance, and throughout the week I will be posting them, starting with Gate of the Shattered Sun below. I intend to run the last four of the heroic instances throughout the week, and will also offer some feedback on those as well. One thing that I’d like to make a note of with regards to these videos is that we moved the beta off of my SSD to free up space on it, which means that the beta is now running on the same drive that I assigned for FRAPS to write to, which in turn means that I have a little more lag running FRAPS and you may occasionally see some choppiness in the video as a result.

Now that I’ve gotten all of the qualifiers out of the way, let’s get down to my thoughts, shall we? (Man, no wonder my posts can be so long, it takes me hundreds of words just to get to the point!) Read the rest of this entry »

Posted July 30, 2012 by Beruthiel in Beta, Druid Healing, MoP, Mushrooms

Fixing the Forest, Part II – Searching for Solutions   43 comments

Last week I explored the problems that we saw in hard mode raiding with the resto druid toolkit. The identified issue was our significant lack of ability to deal well with burst AE healing situations. The next step is looking for ways to address this issue in MoP. To do this, I think we must first start with the solution Blizzard is proposing, and then discuss what issues we may have and why we may need changes to that proposal to make sure that it solves the issue, rather than exacerbate the problem. Since I’m a pretty firm believer of “don’t bring me a problem unless you have a suggestion for a solution”, I also think it’s important to offer some alternative thoughts on how the issue can be addressed.

Blizzard’s Fix – Healing Mushrooms

In recognizing that something was missing in the resto druid toolkit, Blizzard made an effort to fill in the gap for MoP by implementing a change to the current level 85 ability that druids received in Cataclysm – Mushrooms. Rather than detonate them so that they explode, if you are a resto druid your mushrooms now “bloom” and heal. Read the rest of this entry »

Posted April 10, 2012 by Beruthiel in Druid Healing, MoP, Mushrooms

Mincing Mushrooms – Beta Problem One.   42 comments

So I obtained that illusive beta code, and have been putzing around a bit on the beta. I haven’t done a lot, and I don’t know how much I’ll do until the pre-made 90s become available in the later stages of testing. I have this whole thing about not wanting to spoil the new content for myself before release, but it is conflicted with my desire to try and do my part to make sure that druids are in a good place at launch. Anyhow, in the time I’ve spent in the beta, I have decided that mushrooms have an even bigger problem than their clunky drop 3 and detonate mechanic.

Six Yards

If mushrooms are (unfortunately) supposed to be our magic “fix” for this expansion, we have a very serious problem. Have you ever wondered exactly how big six yards is? The runes in the picture above illustrate it pretty clearly. That is me standing in the middle of my mushrooms detonating them. That is also me starting to panic slightly.

Why? Well, six yards is an absolutely miniscule space. People will literally have to be in each other’s models to receive a heal from mushrooms. And there is no chance in hell that any encounter with a “spread out” mechanic is going to have a viable use for this ability. In my opinion, the range is now our number one concern with this terrible “new” spell. It’s worse than the placement and detonate problems (which are still awkward and cumbersome). It’s worse than the targeting problems (which are still clunky). The six yard range pretty much makes this ability next to worthless in most situations.

In all of my optimism, I just do not see a way that this is going to be practical or competitive when we look at what our counterparts on the healing team are going to be able to do. If the devs want mushrooms to be any sort of “fix” or expect them to provide any sort of “competitive” healing, this must change. There is no “but” or “what if” – if this is our fix to burst healing, it must do better than this.

Our “Fix”

I will admit that I’ve been growing increasingly disappointed as I’ve watched more and more news release surrounding the other healing classes and some of the new abilities and tweaks they are receiving, yet continue to see nothing “new” or “exciting” for druids. Not to mention that Monks at the moment look like they are going to be the healer to end all other healers – but that is a conversation for another day. As I see other healers start to flourish in the beta with their new toys, I can’t help but wonder “what about me?” as I watch druids continue to stagnate. I mean surely Blizzard can’t leave druids out in the cold for another expansion, can they? Surely they have some nifty new thing up their sleeve that they just haven’t released yet, right?

Please, Blizzard, I have faith in you. Do not disappoint me by telling me that all I get are these shitty mushrooms and “symbiosis”. Please don’t make me go through another expansion where I go from “undesirable” to “overpowered” back to “undesirable”. I’m tired of fighting to prove I’m just as viable and versatile as any other healer (hint: I’m not). I’m tired of working twice as hard to get the same results. Please do not leave us with this lackluster “fix” and call it a day.

If you are dead set on these mushrooms, please at least make them viable and competitive. They are going to need a lot of work, and some significant changes to get there. Let’s start with increasing the range to make them useful if your raid isn’t piled on top of each other in the tiny confines of six yards. Once we’ve fixed that, we can talk about ways to make them more desirable. But before we can get to that step, this must be resolved.

Posted April 3, 2012 by Beruthiel in MoP, Mushrooms

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